So this is supposed to be my “year off” – I’m only going to college next year, in September… So far it’s not working very well… I’m not managing well all that I’m doing – and I don’t think it’s because I’m doing too much, it’s because I’m lost in what I’m doing, I lost focus… So almost all of my time is taken up with things I’m expected to be doing, instead of what I actually want to do…

The two college math courses I’m taking take up a considerable part of my time, and it’s all good, but… well, I can’t argument that it’s bad for me, no knowledge and information is useless, and I’ve been needing to study more math, last year I slacked too much. But I should be studying the things in math that I actually like and has more sense – graphs and probability… But now, every time I start studying that I feel guilty because I have a thousand analysis problems to do… :~/ Well, I can’t quit now, but I’ll be studying on my own next semester…

At the end of last year, everything fit, all was focused and there were so many plans for this year. But I haven’t been able to do almost any of those things I planned… But I guess it’s not a good idea to set as goal things you can’t really control…

My major problem now is money – I wanted to teach less classes, but I can’t afford that, especially if I want to be taking more courses – I wanted to study art, but I guess for the time being I can do that on my own… I want to recapture the things that I loved doing and haven’t had the time for the past years, especially sketching and sculpting…

Bah, I’m just rambling… I’m going to reorganize my time now, see if this time it works… haha, I've had so much self-proclaimed 'd-days' (days where it all changes) that I don't even believe myself. I guess I need to learn to have patience and take things slowly...